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Pardon?

It is a truth universally acknowledged that every single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.

That has no bearing on anything I'm going to write I'm just having real difficulty thinking, and have done for the last two months. I've slowly come to imagine my brain turning into a big scrambled egg - and not the light and fluffy kind.



(Delphie loves a bit of egg and avocado)

I think the brain fog is partly hormone related, possibly blood pressure related, and most definitely overwhelmed with to-do's, responsibility, and life related. In the main that stems from carrying the workload of two full time jobs directly after living in the feed-poo-sleep bubble for 6 months solid. It's been tough. It's affected my health (tonsillitis, colds, fatigue) and my relationships (paying attention is hard when there's no energy left). "Pardon?" nearly incites a domestic around here. I was listening, you are just mumbling etc etc.


(fresh as a daisy)

After work comes the highlight: cuddles and playing with the babe. But it's all too swiftly followed by the bed routine. 


(sitting down is for mugs - even in a vat full of slip hazard)

(milk time at mission control) After that it's adult eat time followed by any other necessary tasks (sometimes more work), followed by escaping into my phone for unwind time, followed by a bit of TV so at least husband and I are doing something together, even though we don't speak and I'm as switched on as a light in a zombie apocalypse.

At the weekend, before we can leave the house we have to compete in a round of the Generation Game. "Nappies... muslin... formula... cuddly toy!" But in this version there's no champagne hamper, and if you forget something there is the punishment of a bawling dependent who just wants to feel the softness of a fresh wet wipe upon their tush, not the stale kitchen roll from the depths of your bag which possibly has your boogies on.


(the new shoes entertained for a few minutes)


 (living the dream)

I've only just gotten over my bout of Baby Brain. I thought that was bad, this is far worse. 
It's been frustrating and unpleasant, and frankly I've had enough of resembling dairy curd.

I'm hopeful things will change over the next few weeks. At work we've just employed another worker to take over my old job and there's some exciting things ahead - a trip to Budapest with girlfriends, Delphie's 1st birthday (gulp), and a holiday to Corfu with the whole family. Then it'll be Halloween, our 5th anniversary, and Chriiiistmaaaas (Slade obvs)!

Time is going by far too quickly and I need to stop sleepwalking through it. It's my mission to snap out of it and be more present. To use my on-time more efficiently and do down time more effectively. The only way is up!

Apologies to anyone I've spoken to over the last three months - I do beg your pardon. 


Happy Sunday XO


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